Opinion: Should christian songwriters write about intimacy with their husband/wife?
Genesis 2:22-24 says, “And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. Then the man said, ‘This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.’ Therefore, a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”
Scripture is very clear on what biblical intimacy should look like: one man and his one wife. Notice how these nouns are singular.
Despite our society’s hunger for passionate love songs (i.e., Taylor Swift’s heartbreak-founded popularity), should songwriters really broadcast the details of intimacy with their spouse through romantic ballads?
What do I mean? Well, if expressions of intimacy — particularly regarding sex — are meant for your wife or husband, shouldn’t they remain a sacred and private experience between spouses?
As a point of consideration, one could evaluate the song “Supply and Demand” by Wilder Woods.
Wilder Woods is a pseudonym for lead singer of NEEDTOBREATHE’s Bear Reinhart’s solo musical endeavors. Reinhart has a strong Christian background from his role in this popular Christian rock band that has seen many of their hits score notable positions on Billboard’s Hot 100 chart.
NEEDTOBREATHE is, recognizably, controversial at best — but not because their lyrics are unbiblical. According to RollingStone, “though frequently tagged as a Christian-rock band because of their initial successes in Christian radio markets, NEEDTOBREATHE resists that categorization because of the challenges it presents to non-evangelical listeners.” However, most of their lyrics can be recognized as faith centric.
But what about Reinhart’s “Supply and Demand?”
The song is akin to the poetry found in Song of Songs (or in some Bible translations, Song of Solomon). Particularly the lyrics: “When the night’s too much and you need a touch; maybe I can kiss you right…”
As many of us know, Song of Songs is a love poem addressed from Israel’s King Solomon to one of his wives. Theologians believe this collection of poems were included in Scripture to showcase a strong example of biblical marriage and intimacy. In some ways, Solomon’s literary work reads like a song.
As a matter of fact, the title of the book “Song of Songs” is a Hebrew idiom that means “the greatest song.”
This song of Solomon’s, while perhaps momentarily uncomfortable due to the occasionally explicit analogous nature of the lyrics, is a tasteful way of showcasing God-honoring intimacy, but was not originally intended to be broadcasted for generations to read.
He wrote, and gave them to his wife — for her eyes only.
It was something between the two of them — totally private — until the Lord used someone to collect the poems to include them in the Bible.
While I can’t speak for what Reinhart’s wife consented to, I do think that “Supply and Demand” should have been kept between the couple.
The world doesn’t need to know about the extensive details of intimacy between a married man and woman. There are other ways to declare love publicly for a spouse without suggestive lyrics that are borderline explicit; even the song’s title itself provides an unrealistic, and possibly harmful idea of sex.
Sex that aligns with biblical standards and functions as a testament to God’s perfect plan is not a transaction, and should not be described as such. Rather, a Godly marriage allows Christ to be the center of the relationship and allows all things to flow from there.
Ultimately, if you are a Christian singer or songwriter, don’t broadcast your sex life. Allow your intimacy to remain between God and your spouse.
Merritt is the arts and culture editor for the Liberty Champion.