Connor Bogardus
1 year ago

The Reason Why I Sing: Failure || Future

Read time: 2 minutes

Maybe I’m just not called to this.

If God really wanted to use me, I wouldn’t still be struggling with this.

Can you imagine if they found out about my past?

If you’re anything like me, these thoughts aren’t foreign to you. They’re very real. As overwhelming as these feelings can be, they are nothing but lies to distract you from becoming the person God has called you to be. I’ve been there, and there is hope.

When I could only see my failures, Jesus saw my future.

And so, I sing.

But, I have to be honest here.

I still have a difficult time accepting His grace. At times, I hold myself to an unobtainable standard. Sure, I can show others grace. I can sing about grace.  Still, somehow, I have become like a Pharisee to myself. My pride stands in the way of the forgiveness I seek. I can’t outrun my shortcomings.

Have you ever felt this way?

“But He gives more grace.” – James 4:6a

Now that is freedom.

Don’t get me wrong, in no way should this frame of thinking cause us to glorify our sin. We have to be careful here. Grace is not a means to give us permission to sin. Romans 6 confronts this issue: “Are we to continue in sin that grace may abound? By no means!  How can we who died to sin still live in it?”  As followers of Christ, we are called to be obedient, not perfect. God’s plan wasn’t to create perfect people, but to redeem imperfect people through the perfection of His Son.

Jesus tells us in Matthew 9:13b, “For I came not to call the righteous, but sinners.”

Because of this, I believe that God can choose to call us in the midst of our mess. I used to think that my mess proved me to be unworthy to follow God’s calling on my life, but then I realized that He can use my failure for His glory. My testimony is a picture of redemption by the grace of God.  So is yours.?

Think about it. If God can take the dust of the earth and form man, then He can certainly take your brokenness and make you whole. We deserve death, but we are offered life. Jesus suffered and died for every messed up, despicable action you and I have ever done and will ever do. That’s grace.

How could we not sing?

I sing because of unending grace. I sing because my failures are not my future.

We all sing for different reasons. In fact, there are certain songs that evoke particular truths that lead me to worship for specific purposes. We worship a holy, perfect, endless God.  His faithfulness never fails. His love is astounding.  His grace is relentless. We will never run out of reasons to worship.

In his book, The Ragamuffin Gospel, Brennan Manning writes, “My deepest awareness of myself is that I am deeply loved by Jesus Christ and I have done nothing to earn it or deserve it.”

There it is.

Your present is not your past. Your future is not your past. 

In my life, it has taken a true realization of grace to overcome my past and recognize that God is using my transformation to impact His Kingdom for His glory. And so, I worship out of a place of thankfulness. I worship because I am undone by God’s patience with me. I know He has called me.

Jesus is our hope – the reason why I sing.